When A Heart Breaks, No It Don't Breakeven
by xShelliAteYourSandwichx
Summary: For DiBiaselover;; John screwed up, Christi left. Will his heart ache or will things break even? Cena & OC. Small mention of Ted DiBiase.


**When A Heart Breaks, No It Don't Breakeven**

My friend DiBiaselover – Christi – had a break up a few weeks ago and I promised her I'd write something to cheer her up. Of course, I'm always a little late because I need the inspiration but I really hope you like this, Christi!  
Title/music credit to The Script for _Breakeven  
_I own nothing but the idea.

* * *

I never knew it was going to hurt this bad. I was the one who did this to her, so why does this bother me?

I cheated on her, it was wrong but I couldn't help myself. Multiple times I've lied to her, telling her I'd be at functions and events, when really I was off with another one of the divas. And still, I see her down in the locker room or off with a small group of co-workers and she's smiling, the same attractive smile that caught my attention two years before.

I want her back but there is no way she would ever want me.

_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing.  
__Just prayed to a God that I don't believe in'  
Cause I got time while she got freedom  
'Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven_

I didn't know how much I really did love her until she told me two weeks ago that our relationship was over. There were no tears, no crack in her voice. She sat down with me after I came back from a Make-A-Wish charity event, saying we really needed to talk about things.

"I know about it all, and as much as I tried to lie to myself," she had paused. "It just shone on your face," I was guilty and she was right.

"I love you, John and I always will," she spoke. "But I deserve better and I could just feel it in my heart that we weren't meant for each other."

It didn't hurt for the first few days because I'd watch her leave with the girls and then come back to the hotel later in the evening with her nails done or bags fully packed with clothes and shoes. I figured it was her way of grieving over something that I destroyed so long ago.

And then I saw her all dressed up, looking more beautiful than ever…and she was with Ted.

_Her best days will be some of my worst  
She finally met a man that's gonna put her first  
While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping  
'Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven, even, no_

There's a saying; 'You'll never know what you have until its gone'. Man, does it speak the truth! I never meant to hurt her; I never meant to use her. She has this attitude and this character to her that I've always loved. I never thought I would miss it this bad.

Our relationship hit the rocks when she was drafted to Smackdown. Christi hit the top when she was crowned with the Women's Championship, she started to do a lot of promotions and charity work, and it let her on the road a lot more while I stayed behind to do a close niche type of advertising.

I was proud of her, I'll always be and at the same time I missed her, just like I do now. I needed something to ease my pain. I knew she was always faithful and I thought I'd never get caught.

And I hate to admit it, but I wanted her to miss me, I made a load of screw ups and I wish I could make everything up, although I can't erase the past; it all happened for a reason, a reason I won't know until I can gather the courage to move on, myself.

It surprised me how Christi's able to pick up her pieces and keep herself together. The past few Monday nights she's come around on Raw events to watch Ted DiBiase perform. It was like stabbing a knife into my chest, I wasn't able to focus.

_What am I suppose to do  
When the best part of me was always you and  
What am I suppose to say  
When I'm all choked up and you're okay_

I thought I'd be okay with it all, I guess I was way off. Like I said, I did this and I never expected the outcome to hurt this bad. It's the complete opposite from what it would've probably come out to be with, if it were any other girl.

_I'm falling to pieces; yeah  
I'm falling to pieces_

I just wish I knew what was in store for my future. Will she ever talk to me again? Will she ever find someone else who she can truly love who will treat her right? …Will I?

No matter how many times I try to tell myself that it'll all just get better, it seems to be getting worse for me. I feel the pieces falling and I'm just way too overwhelmed to go pick them up and glue them together again.

_They say bad things happen for a reason  
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding  
'Cause she's moved on while I'm still grieving  
And when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven, even, no_

Christi didn't cry, she didn't grieve, she didn't lose her focus on her career; she just flashed a smile, grabbed onto the heart of another upcoming talent and kicked major ass all over television, revealing how dominant and strong she really was.

I'm happy that she's moving on and at the same time, I wish she missed me. She doesn't show any signs of it, so nothing that could possibly be altered, is there. I'm in two pieces; unsure and unsettled, with no one to blame but myself.

_I'm falling to pieces, yeah  
I'm falling to pieces, yeah  
I'm falling to pieces  
(One's still in love while the other one's leaving)  
I'm falling to pieces  
('Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven)_

Is it bad that I find this unfair?

_You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain  
You took your suitcase, I took the blame  
Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains, oh  
'Cause you left me with no love and no love to my name_

This whole time I have been the player in the game, except this time she ended up playing me. In the end, I'm the one to lose. She up and left like nothing ever happened, leaving me with nothing but a whole lot of regrets.


End file.
